Help, I’m surrounded by morons.

I am, and this is me venting spleen.

I have a property forum called property tribes, it’s a small forum as far as the amount of members but the busiest property forum in the UK as far as alexa is concerned.

The trouble is it’s now become apparent that I can’t post on it.

Reason: I’m consistently having to moderate certain few people that have a vindictive nature and that hide behind blind rhetoric and malice.

What do you do? Wade in and meet them head on?

Can’t. Reason, I’m the moderator and by default have to be seen leading by example. Moreover, I don’t really want to.

But it would appear that I have to.

I know, in time, they just leave a trail of destruction behind them for all to see. And I know that there must be a huge battle going on inside their heads that is all consuming. But my question still remains – why?

Why is it that certain people on the web feel as if they have the right to be police, it’s almost verging on stalking. They appear to follow you around trying to undermine ethics and content.

I’m not alone in this. In this instance I’m just having a rant (thanks for that), but how many people suffer the same thing, what is it about the web that has unleashed this tirade of tyrannical nonsense?

What should I do to help them in their hour of need?

Or is it that there are morons and there’s nothing I can do?

Seth Godin once said that you have to remarked on to be remarkable. Whilst I’m grateful for their attention I have to question why they invest their time, attention and energy in my affairs rather than their own.


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  1. Penny Power
    Posted October 11, 2011 at 8:17 am | Permalink

    Nick, this is a sad reality of anyone that is making a positive difference, there are a lot of very angry people and sadly there are many unstable people on line.

    As you know we have experienced this since we banned a number of members for their behaviour, despite many conversations to try to change behaviours, they were not willing. They gave us no alternative. Ecademy has maintained its strong values and is a place for good people, I have no regrets BUT I have many many sleepless nights over the pain they put us through and sadly sone still do, even 6 years on their stalking, harassment poison continues, it amazes me who I see being happy to be associated with those people online, their evil is very addictive to others. They are like a soap opera, a guilty pleasure for many.

    The integrity and safety of your community is your number one priority, and I know you know that, the poison can make it somewhere that not even you would want to be, so I suggest we meet for a coffee and chat this through and I help you to manage this emotionally and give you any tips that I can to help.

  2. Posted October 11, 2011 at 8:20 am | Permalink

    Dude where ever you go and what ever you do this will always happen as I’m sorry to say its part of a human nature grown without having a cure. it is common place to dis and to hurt people to scare them in to a believe or way of thinking.

    Take Haloween people say a festive period I say we are teaching our kids to scare people and to top it of they get thought to say give me something and if not I will do something to you. Now is that the right way to teach care and share?? I think not.

    What you and V have achieved is amazing & many people stand with you on this and understand that you need to lead by example. If it was me I would meet them head on as in my opinion they are just bullies and like bullies in real life they are more affraid of themselves and that is way they hit out like this mostly hiding behind false faces.

    The internet is an extension of us now it is part of life and business and what ever you do or where ever you go you’r3 going to meet .

    Wil this ever stop?? IMHO only when mindsets change and for some of these people I’m sorry to say its to late.

    Nick keep doing what you are doing and if you need a someone to take this head on I’m not a moderator just someone who has been on the receiving end of things like this online and off line.

    Dude your cool and keep head high

    #brohugs to you

  3. Posted October 11, 2011 at 8:34 am | Permalink

    Hi Nick

    Yes, it sadly appears to be an issue in many places.

    I’m a mod on a few sites and have to deal with this.

    What you & V do is of great value, my £3 million blog refers:

    I think it was Seth who said that there are some people now who will hate us online, even though they have never met us & don’t know us!

    One of the things with visibility is that people form an opinion themselves and then try to justify it by what they think you are posting.

    In my own situation I use the BNI policy to disarm a troll:

    Acknowledge their viewpoint

    Respond politely

    Make it right – which can be agreeing that their view and yours don’t agree

  4. Anonymous
    Posted October 11, 2011 at 10:01 am | Permalink

    Thanks Jay, people are weird that’s for sure.

    N x

  5. Anonymous
    Posted October 11, 2011 at 10:05 am | Permalink

    @pennypower Hi Penny, thank you. It’s been going on for a while now, but I just can’t get my head around why!  They are leaving a trail of silliness and corruption and yet they won’t let it go.

    Maybe it’s because we are making a difference?

    I’m not going to let it lie though, I will carry on and I will do it for the reasons we started it – and I’ll do it knowing that  the wise Seth Godin and Penny Power give me the strength to see it through.


  6. Anonymous
    Posted October 11, 2011 at 10:06 am | Permalink

    Thanks James, as a rule I do the same, and even today I did the same – thankfully I have my blog to let go on!


  7. Posted October 11, 2011 at 10:34 am | Permalink

    Hi Nick, I have just seen this quote and feel it sums this situation up well – “Life is too short to wake up with regrets. Love the people who treat you right and forget about the ones who don’t.”

    Have a great day buddy.

  8. Anonymous
    Posted October 11, 2011 at 11:37 am | Permalink

    That’s a good quote to live by, I shall partake.


  9. Teena Vallerine
    Posted October 18, 2011 at 11:28 am | Permalink

    I was once taught a very valuable lesson of how to cope with beastly people. Don’t see the behaviour, accept that (unless they are criminally insane of course) there is other baggage driving it that is nothing to do with me and ‘out-nice them’. The person who taught me this was an outstandingly calm and non-confrontational individual. I don’t always succeed, but it’s a less stressful viewpoint to take. Don’t give up on PT. It’s a fantastic forum and you deserve your place in that. Use your right as moderator to delete trolls. Otherwise don’t get into a discussion with them any more than you would with the angry bod in the supermarket queue. Just politely dismiss.
    Online is a perfect media for these stressheads because their behaviour is anonymous. If they won’t put a face to their comments why continue to allow them in the community?

  10. Anonymous
    Posted October 19, 2011 at 12:36 pm | Permalink

    thank you teena xx 

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